24 Comments
User's avatar
BETH COTTER's avatar

I laughed until I cried, until I read about the betrayal. You’re right - it’s so very hard to grow moral courage!

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Some Guy's avatar

I’d like to think I’d own up to it now. But I’d also like to think now that I have the “you’re having a panic attack” thought loop I’d also just go use a restroom.

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Alison Young's avatar

I embarrassed myself laughing uncontrollably, reading this in a public place. Right—until that kicker. Learning about moral courage as a child—and experiencing the shame—a powerful way to learn. Was there no such learning in the lives of these people who can’t seem to muster an ounce of moral courage as our elected leaders??

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Some Guy's avatar

I was laughing pretty hard at 1am in my kitchen when I wrote the first part because I had to go back and make it real in my head and also just thinking on it now that I had kids. I’m not joking when I say I return to this memory about once a week. I have a different perspective on how bad it was now that I’m a dad and I’m guessing Jesse and the others probably don’t even remember.

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Midwest Molly's avatar

I love this so much!!

I sent it to my sister, who is a special ed teacher. She will love it too.

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Some Guy's avatar

You have to let me know what she says

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Kent White's avatar

I laughed until the betrayal broke my heart. I betrayed poor Carrie in a similar way in 4th grade and I still feel for that girl. I hope that Christ will heal her from all the abuse she suffered at my and others' words. Thank you for helping so many of us feel less alone.

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Ofifoto's avatar

My husband lifted his butt cheek to fart (which always makes me laugh & I'm no third grader) just before I got to that part of the story, so reading your tale was extra hilarious. Wonderful writing. Took me from hilarity to heartbreak in the space between paragraphs. I'm guessing Jesse is the kind of guy who will have forgiven the mystery farter long ago, but I bet he learned a few things that day, too.

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Some Guy's avatar

We all grew like an expanding gas that day.

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functional hypocrite's avatar

My wife was asleep upstairs and I was eating a piece of bread as I read this, simultaneously trying to not wake her and to not choke. It’s very difficult to laugh both quietly and safely with a mouthful of bread. I’m happy to report neither unfortunate event occurred.

Moral courage is hard when you’re a kid. Hell, it’s no walk in the park as an adult. It’s a practice, not a perfect. I really enjoyed this piece!

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Vanessa's avatar

Thank Jebus for the laughter! 😂

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Some Guy's avatar

I howled while writing it.

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Agnes's avatar

I literally went from laughing so hard to crying.. poor Jesse!! God will forgive you 💔

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Some Guy's avatar

Thanks Agnes.

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Amos's avatar

Do all humans go through an age where they think the sound of farts is the result of butt-cheeks flapping together? It seems like understanding the true nature of farts should be a documented developmental milestone.

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Some Guy's avatar

We need a survey in this immediately. It might be a Rome thing.

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Anna Trombley's avatar

SchmloooOOOooo? - that is a fart noise I have yet to meet!

Poor Jesse. Poor you. Perhaps somewhere somehow, in the vast soup of being, he has been vindicated & you have been forgiven.

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Some Guy's avatar

Wait. You’ve never had a fart that sounded like it was asking a question because the pitch goes up at the end?

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Anna Trombley's avatar

Well yeah, but I am thinking of the sound as more like a teeny kazoo in the orofice, not quite so sibilant, but squeakier creakier.

Oh well, different orifices, different expressions perhaps...😎

Anyhow - here's to a vocabulary of flatulence!

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Some Guy's avatar

How about fripfripfrip?

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Betsy's avatar

I laughed so hard I startled my granddaughter - who then beamed at me (she has never heard me laugh that loud and repeatedly). Then I cried but I hid that from her because how could I explain how much I related to the betrayals I've committed and how I regret every one with all my heart. Thank you.

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Noah Pardo-Friedman's avatar

This is such a good piece of writing. Your use of language is excellent, and this hit me right in the feels. I thought about all the times I failed to be courageous, all the moments I look back on with shame.

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⚡Thalia The Comedy Muse⚡'s avatar

I literally lol'd so loudly!

It's kinda funny how many professional comedians were mistakenly put in Special Ed. classes. Seems like you're on the right track!

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Andrew Weber's avatar

OMG what a brilliant piece of writing. Well done. 5 stars. Reminds me of Le Petomane.

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